When one thinks of happiness, it’s interesting to consider “where” in oneself it happens. The location of happiness is not in one’s elbow, knees, wrists, kidneys, liver, etc.! Instead, happiness happens in one’s mind.
But then, one can ask, what is the mind? The mind is essentially a collection of flowing thoughts. Every waking moment, one is always “thinking”, constantly creating many thoughts. It’s what makes one “conscious” and, in many ways, it makes one human.
The thousands of thoughts in one’s mind interact to determine how happy one is at that moment. Thoughts are incredibly powerful in influencing one’s state of happiness. Some thoughts are “positive” for one’s happiness, as in they help one feel more positive and content. On the other hand, some thoughts are “negative” for one’s happiness, as they tend to lower one’s mood.
If one is to find happiness, it’s important not to let negative thoughts affect one’s well-being. Understanding the difference between positive and negative thoughts is a good starting point. I will explain the concept using the simple example below.
Let us imagine that two people are working for an excellent company. This company pays big salaries and offers numerous luxurious perks. Unsurprisingly, both these people are very happy.
But now imagine that things go wrong with this company. The management makes some very poor business decisions, resulting in the company losing money. Eventually, despite heroic efforts, the once fantastic company goes bankrupt. With no money to continue operating, our two workers lost their jobs.
Unsurprisingly, both are now miserable in the immediate aftermath of losing their lucrative jobs.
When facing this stressful situation, imagine that the two people in our scenario think differently.
One of them thinks, “Well, that was a great job, but that is no more. There is no point in thinking of what I have lost. Instead, I must start job hunting to pay my household bills.”
On the other hand, the other person has thoughts such as, “How terrible! Bad things happen only to me. I will never get another job. There is no point trying as the world is useless.”
Both people have to face the same problem, but each has a markedly different way of “thinking” about it.
The first person’s thoughts were “positive” as they did not worsen the person’s sadness. This person’s thoughts kept their mind in a state where they could effectively consider potential solutions. The positive outlook will help the person move on and ultimately find a new job.
On the other hand, the second person’s thoughts were “negative” as they only made the person feel bad and offered no constructive solutions. With these negative thoughts, the person may well spiral into depression, which itself may make finding a new job difficult.
Despite facing the same stress, the first person’s positive way of thinking kept them relatively happy. In contrast, the second person’s negative way of thinking made that person unhappy. Two different outcomes, just by thinking differently. In this way, thoughts can be a powerful factor in determining happiness.
Small note: I am the author of this website, and I would be grateful for a small favour (not money!) that takes only a few seconds! As a special project, I plan to create a website that will share information about happiness in a unique way, as a fictional story about a wise monk who explains to a person, using examples from daily life, the path to happiness. The interaction between the monk and the person will allow deep exploration of various aspects of happiness. For the website, I have obtained the website names listed below, but I’m unsure which one is better. Grateful if you can help me choose by voting for the name you think is better. Your answer will help me decide. Thank you!
For happiness, it is essential to limit the power of negative thoughts to affect one’s happiness. A primary aim of Happy Thinking is to give practical ways to achieve this. The main focus of Happy Thinking is as follows:
1. Help recognise negative thoughts.
If one is to deal with negative thoughts, one needs to first recognise when such thinking arises in one’s mind. It would be impossible to deal with something you cannot detect! To help one with this, I will describe, in a clear way, common negative thoughts that people have. I will give examples that will help one better understand the various negative thoughts.
2. Help overcome negative thoughts.
Once one recognises negative thoughts, a key ingredient for happiness is overcoming them. I will share practical mental techniques you can use for this in your day-to-day life. In particular, I will share with you a three-step method I created, drawing on ideas from modern psychology, to address negative thoughts. I find this method very effective for dealing with negative thoughts, and I will explain it on this website later.
3. Learn from wisdom.
For happiness, one needs to think in a balanced, compassionate way and make sound judgments. This way of thinking is called “wisdom”, and one should strive to apply it in ones day to day thinking. For thousands of years, right up to modern times, many people have searched for happiness and accumulated vast wisdom, which they have revealed to the world. At various points on this website, I will share such wisdom to help one think in ways that lead to happiness.
The use of the above concepts together is what Happy Thinking is about, and it will help one to find happiness. In the coming pages, I will explain it all to you.